Monday, May 10, 2010

How long til my soul gets it right?

Listening to: "Galileo," Indigo Girls.
Photo from this shoot.

I have some serious life updates that I wanted to tell you all, because at this point we're friends and it feels weird to omit this info from my blog, because it's going to affect it a bit.  I just found out recently that I'm not going to graduate school, at least not this fall. The news was devastating, and I am still sad because it was my huge life goal for this year. But I'm going to reapply to more schools until I get accepted into an international affairs/policy track program. In the meantime, I've decided to take a full-time position as a sales associate at a national department store retailer to make money/learn more about the business/keep myself busy during the year. 

I really have to say, I was pretty freakin' scared -- and still am a little --- to be making all these changes. I've mostly worked internships/jobs related to journalism (news writing, editing) and politics (mostly public relations), and my last job was an internship at the state Capitol (it ended a couple months ago). To be honest, I've worked in mostly media-related positions since I was in high school, so to do anything different feels like going off track or losing part of how I define myself. It's been hard to admit that the media industry has been tough for me to navigate and break into this past year.

Suffice it to say, I've never worked retail before. I know that many of you work or have worked in retail before, and I admire that. It's just that when you've never done something before, it's kind of scary to jump into the fray. After a lot of crying and soul-searching, I think this will be a good change and possibly a great learning experience for me. It also helps that the managers who hired me are really nice and seem to be very friendly and open to helping me with my goals. They mentioned a possibility to turn this experience into a career in retail management or fashion marketing, if I decide to go that way. I'm not sure how I feel about doing that yet, but it's nice to feel like I have options, which didn't seem possible a couple weeks ago.

As for blog changes, you'll see some variance in how I do my outfits.  Per my work's dress code, I have to wear all black, so you'll be seeing some of that on the blog. For a girl who loves to wear lots of color, this will be a huge sartorial challenge, but I'm going to make the most of it. I promise I'll still do outdoor shots and dresses and fun outfits, too, and I think, if anything, my posts will become more prolific as I navigate this new job and try to stretch the limits of this dress code.

It feels better just writing this out and telling you all. I spent a lot of time writing and deleting various drafts of this post, because it felt like I was pouring too much of my soul out, but sometimes things just need to be said. It's been hard not to mention it on here for the longest time, but I had to know for sure what was going on before I said anything. This blog has been one of my only creative writing outlets in the past year, and it's been incredible to have so much support from many of you. I hope you'll continue reading as I start this strange, new adventure. :)

Love,

signature1 by you.

23 comments:

  1. That saying comes to mind, "what we fear doing most is usually what we most need to do" ... who said that? Anyway, new things are scary, but taking them in stride and learning from them is important. Thanks for sharing with us, and best of luck on this unexpected adventure :o)

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  2. Good luck with the new job. At worst, it's a small bump in the road to your previous goals of grad school. At best, it could be an awesome new career path!

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  3. New things ARE scary, especially when they're work-related. Good for you for reevaluating in the face of a disappointment and moving right on forwward!

    I'm actually in the midst of figuring out if a new job is a possibility for the fall or not. Long story but I'll definitely post the details as this process continues.

    I look forward to following you in this new job, with the new style challenges it brings!

    Best of luck in all you do!

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  4. Thanks for sharing the news with us- I understand how hard it can be to really open up on your blog. As long as you're open to what this job will give you (as opposed to what it's not) which it sounds like you definitely are it can only be a valuable experience. Best of luck with your new endeavor and the continuous grad school application process!

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  5. Think of this new job as a great new opportunity for you to try something new - and if it is not a fit or if it does not go down a path you enjoy, you always have the option of backing out.

    Thanks for sharing and best of luck!

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  6. First off I want to know who in their right mind would not jump at the chance to have you in their grad school program. Seriously. Their loss.

    (and I know that perhaps there is more to it than that, but I'm glad to see that you'll be reapplying since I know that's a passion of yours, and I think you more than deserve it. On a personal note, you should know that I've always been impressed with your drive, ambition, and ability. I consider myself an overachiever... but next to you I'm a slacker! and I'm not saying that to get you to tell me that I'm not a slacker, I'm saying it because it really is what I think)

    but really, so proud of you for moving onto the next thing. I feel like I have to do that about every 3 months, and it's always the hardest thing. And so proud of you for being willing to jump out of your comfort zone. You'll be amazed to see how the things that seem to take you away from your path will come into play in future opportunities.

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  7. the best of luck any way your life turns out.

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  8. Oh lady, I'm sending huge hugs your way. It can be so hard to be denied entry to the path you viewed as your own. But I've learned the hard way that any detours just serve to enrich life. It sounds like you've come full circle to seeing this as a possible opportunity, and I am absolutely certain it will be. Everyone's got a 5-year plan, no one ever follows it because life has other plans for US!

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  9. Oh Joann I'm so sorry! I hope that wonderful things come from this change. Thank you for sharing the news with us and I hope that articulating it gave you some comfort. Hang in there!

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  10. Wishing you the best of luck! It can be so hard when life takes us down a different path than what we planned (i know!) but can be so worth it! You'll do great in your new job!!! :)

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  11. I think we're all at that place. After May 26th I will have no idea what to do with myself. I have no idea where I'm moving or what to do with my life. Just enjoy these few months "off" and keep applying!

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  12. Best of luck with these changes! I'll be wearing all slacks this summer, you'll be wearing black...hopefully we'll come out of these challenges even more creative with our clothing! I'm very excited to read about the new job as you get started. Will (obviously!) continue reading :-D And I'm sorry to hear about grad school. Seriously----their loss.

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  13. As the Lennon quote goes, "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans." I've definitely had to come to the realization that life doesn't work out the way we plan, as I'm also not in graduate school right now when I thought I would be. But really, it's turned out for the best and I'm sure it will for you also. I definitely understand the worry of "leaving your field" to work in retail, as I've faced that a bit myself also, but I think it's best to always look at jobs like you seem to be - there's always something to learn and somewhere it can take you. Good luck with it all :)

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  14. New things are scary - but i just know you will be okay :D

    Sorry to hear they didnt take you on .. but as many blogers have already said - there loss!!

    Sal xXx

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  15. I have the utmost confidence in your ability to make the dress code work for you, not the other way around. Good luck with the new job, and congrats on starting a new chapter, even if an unexpected one.

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  16. im sorry to hear the bad news but im glad u found job to keep u occupied. ull do great my dear and i bet ull be the best looking one there in ure chic black outfit! ;-)keep ure head up love ... and best wishes!

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  17. Well, having worked in journalism and now in retail, I think you'll do just fine. I think you'll notice that your talking skills and comfort with people from your past jobs (I guess I'm making assumptions but most people in the news are at least good at faking outgoingness. Ha!) will serve you well.

    I hope you have lots of fun too! I've always been worried about taking on a retail job where I can wear only black. But the one time I did, it totally tested my creativity in new ways.

    Good luck! I can't wait to hear how it all goes!

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  18. I think you will be fine, especially if you have done PR stuff! I got my degree in English and my Journalism minor in PR and I actually worked as a retail manager for a year or so after college- and it did actually prove to be helpful!

    If you ever need advice on dealing with retail stuff and such- feel free to email me as I worked in retail for quite a while (first as an associate, then as a store manager)

    Good luck! I know you will do well and you will wind up where you want to be soon!

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  19. I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don’t know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

    Alena

    http://dataentryjob-s.com

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  20. Hi Joann - I've been following your blog for a few weeks now and I was so impressed with your dress collection! You've inspired me to add more to mine, because they're just so girly and fun and adorable :)

    As for life changes, it can only go up and up for you from here! Cheesy, but everything happens for a reason... but it just sucks when your plans don't work out (I would know... I got rejected twice from nursing school in the last couple of years, and had to kinda deal with the feeling of rejection, and what's next/right for me, etc.).

    I hope your retail experience is fun, provides you a great discount, and I have no doubt it will add to the plethora of fabulous traits you already possess.

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  21. As someone on the other side of things (i.e. a professor who reviews grad student applications) I just want to say don't get discouraged! So many factors go into deciding who to admit, and sometimes good students don't get in. I would recommend contacting the graduate programs you applied to and asking them what you can do to make your application better next year. Most professors are genuinely interested in helping students, and thus you might get some useful feedback.

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  22. Who knows what's in store for you! Sometimes something doesn't work out because you need to go on another path! I guess I believe in some sort of fate, but at least try to look at the positives! A year from know you may look back and think that's when my life changed for the better! Maybe?

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  23. Let me second what Dr. Da said. I am currently a grad student in Sociology, but only because I got rejected from the American Studies department at the same school. When I received my rejection, I contacted the Am. Studies program, and that was an INVALUABLE move. I learned that it wasn't me. I probably was not a good fit for their program; it was not what I thought. I am SO GLAD I changed to Sociology, and I never would have done so without making that contact.

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